Special K: "Japanese pole vaulter disqualified from Rio after his penis knocks bar off"
30.7.21
29.7.21
Reese's Puffsnstuff
b1-66er: We've now moved to the next level...
***
Special K: From
Don't play with your food
to
Play your food.
b1-67er: Great idea.
***
Cap'n Happy: It's like a SNL sketch, without the laughs
66: Great line.
27.7.21
Double exposure
b1-66er:
There was a man. He lived in an apartment. And put a wall down the middle.
On one side he had furniture, clothes and books.
On the other side he had different clothes. Different furniture.
And a TV set...
He'd live on one side, until he got tired of it...
He'd put his book down. Take his clothes off.
And walk over to the other side...
And he'd live there until he got tired of it...
And he'd flip flop...
And he did this back and forth until he died...
After he died, they went in to clean up the apartment so they could rent it out to college students...
These people went back to the closet in the very back of the apartment. And the whole closet was filled with these books...
... And each book was exactly the same...
... And this man had written all these books and had them all published...
... He never sold one, or gave one away...
... The name of the book was
Life and How to Live It
Special K: Thoughtful book story. Where is it from? Did you write it?
b1: No.
Did you ever see REM in their early days?
Stipe had this ability to just go off and tell these long stories in concert.
I saw them enough times that I heard some stories multiple times...
K: Cool. I didn't see them until they were already huge.
b1: On one of the anniversary releases of Document, that story is the intro to a live version of Life and How to Live it.
I thought the story was not only fascinating and compelling; but also provided a spectacular Polaroid of what it was like to be in an REM audience...
They were a strange band because they came from a place no one (yet) cared about...
... And at their very deepest core were all record store weevils...
... The result was they liked what I liked.
They'd play requests.
They'd play without a set list and argue about what to play next.
They'd pimp other bands touring the music that they liked, or where they were from.
Document is the album where it all changed and they started getting played on more than just lowly college radio.
26.7.21
Tethered
b1-66er: "Issa Rae Secures Husband"
Special K: Was he floating away?
b1: I assume so. I didn't read the article.
24.7.21
EVERY day is STFUF!
Special K:
b1-66er: Crass, but correct.
b1-67er: That is really funny. The delivery and chain smoking is funny. It's the "there are no deaf and dumb people in prison" advice.
D4rw1n: That is utterly freaking fantastic legal advice
I, literally, charge $1100/hr to say that in different words
Quite honestly, their advice is better than mine. Because it's way easier to remember
Causes me to think about quitting my job
23.7.21
Medals for Everyone
Special K: I'm watching The Olympics on DirecTV. There's an Olympics app, which wasn't there yesterday but is there today. Every time I use it -every few hours- it has new features. I think they're frantically working and updating it.
b1-66er: That's a job you don't want to have.
K: No no no.
b1: See anything interesting?
K: US Women's Soccer lost their opener. Very big upset.
b1: Yeah.
And worse, Sweden beat them last time.
And they were beaten handily.
Is it The Olympics No One Cares About?
K: Yes.
Very astute.
b1: That's funny.
K: I think so, at least now.
Time waits for no one.
But I can record it.
Their next game is v. the lowest ranked team in the group. That should be interesting.
b1: They're gonna have to make another set of medals with an asterix* on them.
*The Olys no one cared about
K: I think the competition will be legit.
Just lots of other stuff is strange. No fans. Nobody to give you your medal.
b1: Do you have to go collect it from a bin?
K: Yes, with tongs and a hairnet.
I haven't seen it yet. I think they said it's on a tray.
b1: A TV tray.
With a cup of Nissin.
Has the US managed to do anything remarkably stupid in the Oly Village yet?
K: Nothing has been reported.
Blow needed first.
b1: Give the Yanquis time. It's like track, they need a chance to stretch and warm-up before the long jump into social ineptitude.
K: But the hosts fired a lead guy because he did an anti-semitic comedy skit some years ago.
b1: I saw that.
K: Maybe he ate bad ice cream.
b1: What flavor Nissin WOULD a gold medalist* be assigned?
<Instantaneous response follows>
K: Potato leek for gold.
Iceberg lettuce for silver.
Banana cinnamon for bronze.
Gold flavor is champion.
Silver flavor is punishment.
Bronze flavor is sympathy.
b1: Are those real flavors?
K: Not AFAIK. I just thought of them.
b1: I love how quickly you just came up with those.
K: I'm a little tired. That probably helps.
b1: Always.
That was the subterranean power of 24HO.
K: Yes, and The Great Discovery.
b1: Which was what, exactly?
(you can say, it's already been discovered.)
K: Tired means creativity.
I guess it's like a drug.
It screws up perspective.
Also lowers my inhibitions.
b1: Oh THAT.
I thought it was brain damage¹.
K: That might also work.
¹the hidden beauty of MS.
22.7.21
Fast food frenzy!
b1-66er: <screenshot clip>
I think these types of images use are being intentionally used to (perhaps somewhat subliminally) combat the 'Sleepy Joe' moniker.
Special K: What types do you mean?
b1: Wide eyed and crazy looking.
Editorial choice is made in every pic that's presented in news...
They have dozens to choose from on every image in every story they run...
And I'm telling you, that expression on his face here is not 'Normal Joe Biden.'
I see this happening more often...
Crazy stuff is showing up occasionally...
I guess the intent is trying to make him look more 'alert and aware.'
Come on, the guy's 80 years old.
He's not gonna look whack-crazy talking about restaurants...
Chinese hacking, maybe.
Fires engulfing the west, probably.
KFC...
K: KFC!!!
b1: Exactly•
21.7.21
A gust up the kilt
Special K: "Halsey Said She Will No Longer Do Press After A Magazine Disrespected Their Pronouns And Posted Interview Quotes Out Of Context"
b1-66er: The first unabashed hater of KTXT•
K: A sign of greatness.
b1: For us...
... Or her?
K: Definitely us.
Two, Green, and Even
The Curator: https://motsusocks.com/products/savvy-sox-roulette-socks?utm_content=Facebook_UA&utm_source=facebook&variant=39353463079006
b1-66er: Who DOESN'T like a roulette sock?
AND IT'S SINGLE ZERO!
•••
b1-67er: If you are buying roulette socks, those are the ones you want.
The Accomplice: Right!
20.7.21
Penetrating observation
b1-66er: "Jeff Bezos Made It To Space But People Can't Help But Notice The Dick-Shaped Rocket He Rode In On"
Special K: I think most rockets are 'penis-shaped,' for the same reason as penises.
19.7.21
Tide e-Soul
Special K: This is the first time anyone has been inside our house in 16+ months.
b1-66er: Howz it feel?
K: Weird and nerve-wracking, even though they're vaxxed and masked. Windows are open, central fan is on.
<4 hours pass>
The maids are done. They spent 3 hours doing "deep cleaning."
Sounds sexy. It's not.
Judge gives an F for the E-ticket experience
b1-66er: This is a truly 'just' sentence.
(The defendant's statement to the court was absolutely top notch.)
Special K: Yes. "The company of us who remained calmer in our protests may have made others feel emboldened."
"Your honor, if I have a weakness, it's that I care TOO MUCH."
66: It's best that you weren't the one presenting.
b1-67er: What's weird is the people they end up catching are the ones that are showing their faces on camera. A lot of the people pushing the cops around were wearing all black and had their faces covered. They were dressed for trouble. I wonder how many of them have been caught.
66: I think we'll eventually find out.
K: The disguised ones were probably also not the ones on social media posting "DOOD I AM INSIDE THE CAPITOL JUST WROTE STUFF ON PELOSI'S WALL LOLZ OMG"
Some were doing an actual insurrection, and some were on the Insurrection Simulator ride.
67: I think so. Some of these guys -probably this guy- were four parts dumbbell one part insurrectionist. But some came with every intention of causing real trouble.
17.7.21
So THAT'S why those antennae are 'springy'...
Special K: "Curiosity rover discovers that evidence of past life on Mars may have been erased"
b1-66er: What a Great GREAT GREAT headline.
If it was the Weekly World News of our youth, it'd have a tag-on...
"... and with Eberhard eraser...
... FROM THE FUTURE!"
15.7.21
Every little bit counts
Special K: 'According to the company website, the original recipe calls for the inclusion of the previous day's batch, a graining process that continues to this day. "As such, there's (theoretically) a bit of Leo's very first Tootsie Roll in every one of the sixty four million Tootsie Rolls that Tootsie produces each day."'
The inner beauty of environmental desolation
b1-66er:How's the body?
How's the mind?
Hammerer¹: Body's tired. Mind is good. It's always a spiritual experience to get up into the mountains, pushing mind and body, getting unplugged. Hope you are doing well.
(Pix entitled: Desolation Wilderness)
Photos ©2021 Fully Tacked Down Efforts
All rights reserved
Used by permission
¹As with Momma K, today is Ms. Hammerer's birthday
13.7.21
Skunk v. Gorilla
The Accomplice:
<Now LV, NV>
Pic ©2021 Pincesston Pix
Used by permission
All rights reserved
A new type of elbow grease
b1-66er: https://www.thecut.com/2021/07/kraft-mac-and-cheese-ice-cream.html
D4rw1n: The lede paragraph is outstanding
66: Truly.
Must we challenge God every day?
May well be the greatest opening editorial line in the history of the English language.
D4: So freaking good
I am (literally) still laughing from reading it the first time
b1-67er: The idea is marketing genius, although an obvious nod to the Jones Soda Thanksgiving Dinner collection.
66: It violates every Draconian dietary law I have.
It's also a bent fendered participant of the Dietary Demolition Derby of my two former food loves.
I would absolutely eat a spoon full right now.
D4: Emphasis on Demolition
"Free samples from an ice cream truck on Union Square July 14, while supplies last."
The author suggests that could be forever
Obviously incorrect.
This is absolutely my comment the state of humanity:
That ice cream truck will sell out in a matter of minutes
66: I like your side of the bet better than hers.
***
Sheridonian: No.
I like ice cream. I like Kraft Mac n'Cheese...
But, no.
***
F3mb0t: Uuuum. No.
66: SO adventurous!
F3: Ha! Have you met me? I am better than some for trying new stuff, but pretty boring compared to you. That ice cream is not appealing.
At all.
***
Corporal Math: I thought it was Katy Perry
66: I don't see the difference.
CM: Fair. I enjoy those things equally.
66: I can understand that.
Getting Mac&Cheese into a Shark costume would be a legitimate son of a bitch, though.
***
Juan: Next up : BBQ flavored iced tea!
66: And at that point all of humanity moves to the next level.
***
Mr. Crypto: I had goat cheese¹ ice cream the other day, it was delicious. Tangy.
Cheddar flavored ice cream is quite popular (Philippines? Someplace similar), I've never had it.
¹flavored, I think -- not primarily made from goat milk
12.7.21
Slowly considering a statement
Special K: On Jewish fast days, some people say "have an easy fast." Is that appropriate to say to you?
b1-66er: I think "have an easy fast," is not only appropriate; but also a clever and reasoned interpretation.
...ALMOST every waking moment...
b1-66er: What's the weirdest cereal in NJ, you say?
WONDER NO MORE!
Special K: I've been looking for Chocolate Frosted Flakes for a decade.
(Not continuously.)
11.7.21
Peeking Boo!
The Instigator: <pic>
The owl box we had installed in May 2020 is finally occupied. The guy who installed said it would take about a year.
The little guy has been chilling all day watching us in our yard.
DPRUSA: Cool. I love owls.
I can tell you how I ran my biology experiment to see what they're eating. I bet they nosh on mice and squirrels.
TI: We're hoping for gophers
DP: Yes, I bet Mr/Ms Owl would find them tasty
Photo ©2021PushMeKickU, Ltd. Used by permission. All rights reserved.
9.7.21
Nun the less
Special K: "Paul Verhoeven's latest Cannes movie is an onslaught of graphic sex, graphic deaths, elaborate nun gossip, and incredibly groomed pubic hair."
b1-66er: It also has its bad points.
7.7.21
Depends on the arm rails
b1-66er: "Bitcoin power plant is turning a 12,000-year-old glacial lake into a hot tub"
Special K: That sounds bad.
4.7.21
A Happy 4th of July to all KTXT readers
Special K: Papa got a brand new flag.
b1-66er: Walk your talk.
3.7.21
The rainbow of the Pro Tree
b1-66er: "Ukrainian 'parade in heels' plan sparks backlash"
D4rw1n: I suggest a better marketing plan...
Here, it is: Full-on Drag Race
b1: Yes yes YES pun intended!
D4: And nobody doesn't love a drag race
2.7.21
All this and marmot too!
Former Meat Man: Glacier National Park, MT
All pix ©2021 Veggie-cicle Productions
(Used by permission)
Face Off!
Special K:
"Victor Hedman of Tampa Bay is the first player in NHL history to score a goal in each of the 12 calendar months. Due to the pandemic schedule, last year was the first year games were played in August or September. This year's pandemic-adjusted schedule is the first time games are being played in July."
Face on!
The Instigator: I realized long ago, we have to live with the face we were given. Assuming no plastic surgery of course.
K-Sum
Special K: "On this day in 1963, in one of baseball's most memorable pitching duels, the Giants' Juan Marichal and the Braves' Warren Spahn both hurled 15 scoreless innings before Willie Mays ended the marathon with a homer off Spahn in the bottom of the 16th, giving San Francisco a 1- 0 win"
b1-66er: That's the best single TXT baseball description I've ever read.
1.7.21
Lightning licks the thunder thumbs
Special K: "Jeff Bezos announces the fourth passenger on Blue Origin's first crewed New Shepard flight will be Wally Funk, one of the women of the Mercury 13 program"
... Because every time she floated by I could say...
... GET THE FUNK OUTTA MY FACE!
Relaying good feelings
Special K: "'Go Suck a Dick': Quentin Tarantino Fires Back at Critics of His 'OUATIH' Bruce Lee Depiction"
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