24.12.21

The definition of a Merry Xmas

The Accomplice: Three crabs on ice in the cooler in the trunk.

23.12.21

Wërd

Birdhead--

Top Ten 1980's Rappers or Friends of b1-66er:

10. Ice-T
9. Special-K
8. Wonder Mike
7. Entropy Dave
6. LL Cool J
5. Zz
4. Spoonie Gee
3. Stearno
2. Sir Mix-a-Lot
1. Cap'n Happy / Grandmaster Flash (tie)

Once you notice the resemblance, the list pretty much writes itself.

19.12.21

Why Santa banned eggnog

The Accomplice: Poor Rudolf! Went from not being allowed to play... to playing a bit too hard!?!

[Pic ©2021 Drunk-N-Deer Productions 
All rights reserved
Used by permission]

13.12.21

Use your head!

Deadhead: Skull Rock at Joshua Tree NP today 💀 

(Image ©Pix That Make You Bony 2021 all rights reserved. Used by permission.)

10.12.21

Take a bao

b1-66er: <pic> Solid G's in Europe. 

b1-67er: The takeout of our beloved leader?  The trouble with the North Koreans is they are so far gone you can't tell when they are kidding.


(Photo ©2021 Extremely Careful Wrecking Ball Demolitions
All rights reserved, used by permission)

6.12.21

Unleash the penguins!

D4rw1n: No U.S. official will attend Beijing Winter Olympics, White House announces
I missed the meaning of this earlier: the athletes will compete, but the diplomatic officials will boycott

b1-66er: THAT'S the most passive aggressive thing the U.S. had done in my lifetime.

D4: Yeah it's neither fish nor fowl

4.12.21

Ylddo

b1-66er: "Nevada's Supreme Court ruled gun manufacturers cannot be held responsible for the deaths in the 2017 mass shooting on the Las Vegas Strip because a state law shields them from liability unless the weapon malfunctions."

D4rw1n: That's oddly reasonable, yet oddly backward

I'll need a snorkel and some asbestos...

Special K: "Rare blizzard warning in Hawaii as up to 12 inches of snow expected"

b1-66er: Seetting up a superfecta: 
Lava
Earthquake
Tsunami
Snow

1.12.21

Name your future

b1-66er: "General Mills Is Introducing CinnaGraham Toast Crunch & 7 Other New Cereals...
The lineup also includes Reese's Puffs Cluster Crunch."
Whoever was paid to come up with the name, "Cluster Crunch" should receive no more paychecks.

D4rw1n: No more paychecks for naming cereals. They've got a future naming natural disasters or TikTok dances though

29.11.21

Any type of infinity plating you want

b1-66er: https://www.politico.com/news/2021/11/29/judge-jan-6-defendant-broadway-actor-523447

b1-67er: I'm surprised the judge turned that guy loose.  Definite flight risk.

D4rw1n: Yes, what could go wrong? Return the cash, car keys, and ALL HIS GOLD AND SILVER and say "see ya" to all of the above for approximately forever 

23.11.21

No, I said I need a 'spork'

b1-66er: "Las Vegas police give away 300 turkeys ahead of Thanksgiving"

b1-67er: I can see why they didn't go with hams.

The Curse of the Purse

Special K: <pic>

b1-66er: I could've done without being haunted forever, thank you.

K: De nada. 
It's coming up on TCM. 

b1: You watchie?

K: Sadly, no. I'm still trying not to get fired.

b1: IF you get fired, will your first thought be,
"I should've watched 'The Curse of Frankenstein' instead"?

K: It will now.

15.11.21

Armor-y! Oh! Oh!

Special K: "It's like hunting aliens': inside the town besieged by armadillos"

22.10.21

7.10.21

What's the point?

Former Meat Man: In our garden today.
Tomato horn worm.

27.9.21

Ribeye in the sky

b1-66er: https://www.chewboom.com/2021/09/27/arbys-introduces-new-real-country-style-rib-sandwich/

D4rw1n: I'm starting to feel that Arby's may be overextending itself 

b1: I'm starting to feel...
... I may need A REAL COUNTRY STYLE RIB SANDWICH•

D4:Arby's is possibly emulating Checkers and Rally's in this regard. Judging by the Checkers commercials, they appear to be trying to maintain more menu items than the possible maximum number of daily customers. Though I've never eaten there, this seems a flawed freshness strategy to me. I do not want to eat any item where the restaurant's daily turnover of that particular menu object is an average of one

25.9.21

Where the line squiggles

F3mb0t: What was the best thing about your NV border tour with b1-67er?

b1-66er: That's a good question.
Probably just laughing with him.
Our lives are a little too serious.
I'm a little too mean.

F3: That is a good answer.

22.9.21

Wait. Weren't we just here?

Special K: "Tim Cook says employees who leak memos do not belong at Apple, according to leaked memo"

18.9.21

Moore is less

Special K: Julianne Moore is 343 days younger than me. 

b1-66er: Shows how overly long February is.

K: Exactly.

16.9.21

"Very good, class. Next, please use the word 'approximately' in relation to 'Transportation.'"

b1-66er: Just for the record, the DPRK are now claiming they've launched missiles from a train...
...... But, to be a threat, the train has to actually GO SOMEWHERE, right?

D4rw1n: I'd have thought they only had approximately 1 train. Namely, Kim's personal train going back and forth from his country home to the capital 
Pretty risky to launch an ICBM from your personal transport. But pretty badass if you pull it off 
It's a very Bond-villain look. Which is what I always assume he's going for 

14.9.21

In the pinch

Special K: Beautiful specimen. 
Campbell, CA

Pic ©2021 Bug Eyed Pix
All rights reserved
used by permission

Mommy, why is the dust on Mars red?

b1-66er: "Martian Colonists Could Use Their Own Blood to Produce Concrete, New Research Suggests"

D4rw1n: Proving the inverse of the old adage. Turns out you can squeeze stone from blood

I don't see my drink!

The Accomplice: Sitting in Costco Optical, and it's darn busy. The man sitting to my left announces to the crowd in general, "When is that cocktail waitress going to show up?!?"

The biggest lie ever told

Special K: I've said all I will say. 

Death finds a way

b1-66er: Here we go!

D4rw1n: I'm all in 
What could go wrong 
Said john Hammond before the dinosaurs ate everyone 

10.9.21

D-U-M dumb

b1-66er: "Smart Glasses Made Google Look Dumb. Now Facebook Is Giving Them a Try."

Mr. Crypto: They don't just make companies look dumb.

9.9.21

Good. Now gimme a G#!

Special K: Another massive 'performative reorg' at work today. VPs and Directors flying around from organization to organization. A long email names about 25 people I've never even heard of (of course). Net effect on most people is the same as always: nil.

7.9.21

Ready, aim...

b1-66er: How's Smokey?

Blow Smoke: Well all of California is on fire.  I am living in a swimming pool.
I earned that Smokey moniker

b1: Maybe NOW you see how "unusual" your original CO declaration¹ was.

BS: No.  I was right back then.   I flew through smoke to land in Colorado Springs.  The captain came on and said "if you smell smoke, that isn't the plane.  All of Colorado is on fire with the exception of the airport. Thank you for flying the friendly skies"

b1: I've never heard anything like that.
Maybe I should be paying more than $15 for a plane ticket.
What do they say now?
"The planet is doomed. 
We hope to see you on another United flight soon.
Have a nice day."


¹2 decades ago. He claimed it was unsafe to travel to Denver because of a fire in CO Springs (90 miles away). I believe, but am not sure, that everything he's ever known is either currently on fire, or will be by the time you've read this.

6.9.21

Squarely Square

Suttonhoo: <pic>
Your random Labor Day album cover 

b1-66er: Super great.
I am now a fan of Swamp Dogg...
AND random Labor Day album covers

(Concept ©2021 Fuckin WASP Prod.
All rights reserved. Used by permission)

Smile when you shave that

Kπ: Some people have a way with selfies; others,...


{©2021 Pooch or pouch? I forget! Industries
All rights reserved
Used by permission}

5.9.21

(Don't) Eat Your Disease

b1-66er: Mayo Clinic
"Some research suggests that intermittent fasting may be more beneficial than other diets for reducing inflammation and improving conditions associated with inflammation, such as:
Alzheimer's disease
Arthritis
Asthma
Multiple sclerosis
Stroke"

***

b1-67er: Stroke is the zinger on that list. Interesting.  

***

F3mb0t: Yay!!! Gotta love science.  If you are keeping meticulous records, you might be able to sell the research.

66: Interesting thought.
When I think MS, I don't automatically think...
MONEY IN THE BANK!
My records are good, but not science worthy.
More like Thoreau,
less like Curie.

F: That is a great answer!

66: Only because you know the references.

F: It is sad to say that probably most high school graduates do not know them...but they should.

Neither Jew nor genteel

b1-66er: Family trouble!
"Biden promised ISIS-K will 'pay.'"

Special K: We don't talk about that branch. 

4.9.21

Pwned

Special K: "Indiana fails at football -- and spelling -- against Iowa"

Wizard of Godz

Special K: "IS IT JUST ME, OR DOES THE OUTER GOD NYARLATHOTEP SEEM ILL-EQUIPPED TO HANDLE AN OLD-FASHIONED BIBLICAL PLAGUE?"

b1-66er: It's just you.

3.9.21

Tacoma Narrows Bridge

{Pic by The Accomplice 
Tacoma, WA
©2021 BridgeyPixProducts 
All rights reserved
Used by permission}

2 support structures

{Pic by The Accomplice 
Tacoma, WA
©2021 BridgeyPixProducts 
All rights reserved
Used by permission}

2.9.21

As KTXT inches closer to the Web equivalent of 'Mother Jugs and Speed'

b1-66er:  'McDonald's McFlurry lce Cream Machines Under FTC
Investigation'
I hope they throw them all in jail...
... WITH THE HAMBURGLER!

Special K: <pic>

D4rw1n: For an incarcerated motherfucker, that Hamburgler certainly seems to be seen often capering about on the streets 
 I blame an overly permissive fast food-based justice system
It's like 99 billion strikes and you're out 

31.8.21

Fear the air, kiddo

Former Flyer: pic

b1-66er: SO GREAT!
No wonder I never go to Bandera.

FF: Great news coverage; "scary clouds..."

b1: Bandera journalists understand the power of second grade english.

30.8.21

PTA - Public Text Announcement

The only thing everyone at KTXT can agree on is we're all staunchly pro-text...

...Making it easier for you to imagine the joy, wonder and relief when we spotted a caption lurking below a pic of the most recent hurricane Ida devastation...

Editor's Note: (Is your power out or device's battery charge low? Bookmark CNN's lite site¹ for text-only top stories.)

29.8.21

Wink wink blink

b1-66er: (flashing lights, reflectivity and a very strong color contrast. Again.)

b1-67er: They clearly have a problem there. If self driving cars hang in there, it may drive new specs on emergency vehicles. Either frequency of flashing emergency lights, or wavelength of light so self drivers can readily identify them. My guess is the bright light is saturating a sensor, or overwhelming some averaging software. Maybe it fails if the sampling is in phase with the flashing.

22.8.21

Flaming Lips

b1-66er: https://youtu.be/fNINWMqxQQc

D4rw1n: Good use of harp 
Old musician joke:
What's the best use of a burning oboe?
Use that to set the bassoon on fire 

20.8.21

"Let us all remember that which has not yet happened"

Special K: Commence watching Reminiscence (2021). 

b1-66er: Whoa•
Sardonically, I don't even know that movie.

K: It just came out today. 

b1: WELL IT'S GOING TO BE PRETTY HARD TO REMINISCE, ISN'T IT?

K: Oh yes. 

AL mighty

Special K: "An Alabama man thought he'd been shot by an intruder. It turns out it was his wife's boyfriend, secretly living in their house"

The eternal sawbuck

b1-66er: https://thepointsguy.com/guide/budget-las-vegas/

Major Math: Right on a lot...
...wrong on rentals. They are crazy expensive 

The Accomplice: Everyplace is gross right now. I'm trying to rent in Seattle to see my grandbaby, and it's over $100/day. 
They're not super close to the airport, and I'd like to save them the drive.
Plus nowadays you have to pay for parking, too. Oof
It used to be our best-kept LV secret. So much so that we'd go rent a car at the airport the night before traveling, and drive ourselves from home as our airport shuttle. 
I think there's a train that'll get me 2/3 of the way there. That's my current plan. They can pick me up at the metro station

MM: Yeah. It's nuts
The Corporal is in Minnesota now and took a shuttle instead of renting

b1: It must be hard to live like the lower classes.

Corporal Math: I love the shuttle.  I hate driving.

b1: Then I misspoke.
And I'm more with, than against, you.
I like driving highways or mountains. 
I don't like driving cities OR PARKING.

TA: Ah! Is it the kind that might drive you to five other people's drop-offs first? (That's the part that I don't like about old-fashioned airport shuttles.)

MM: She flies into Minneapolis, but is really going to Rochester (Mayo clinic), about an hour away
We NEVER take those horrible airport shuttles

CM: No. Shuttle that takes you from MSP to downtown Rochester.  I slipped him an extra 10 bucks off the books to take me to my mom's house.¹

MM: Especially when we travel together. The price of two shuttle tickets is usually in the same order as an Uber
After the main drop off, or on the way?

CM: After. Not the kind of thing to negotiate in front of others.

b1: That's exactly the right trick...
... Enlarge the sociological interactions of Las Vegas into the inhabitants of the United States. 

CM: Exactly. Good life training.

MM: I'm impressed. It's not like you to talk to people -- especially in "wheeler/dealer" situations
What exactly did you say to him?

CM: I asked him to take me as far south as he could and then I was going to Uber. After the last person got out, he asked if I had called the Uber. I read that as an opening...
...I said I'll give you 10 bucks to drive me to my mom's across from XYZ school.  And he said yep.  I can do that.  And thanks for waiting to ask until the last person got out.
You trained me well Major Math.

MM:  💰 
I'm so proud right now!  

TA: Awesome!

b1: And with that dissertation,
Corporal Math graduated with Honors and a PhD from the University of Life's School of Hard Knocks

CM: Woot. I'll take it. I didn't save any money. Just time and the hubsters pride I guess.

b1: If there's ONE THING I've learned in my 
69 HOURS²
of meditation...
It's that ONLY ONE THING MATTERS IN LIFE
All the rest of "being" is just living in an exact moment...

MM: Whiskey?

b1: ... And that's
HUSTLER'S PRIDE
Everything else is just living in an exact moment...
(and to a lesser extent whiskey)

MM: On that note...did you see the outrageous vaxx add from AR?

b1: No!


b1: Humanity...
... As we know it ...
... IS DOOMED


¹b1's grandfather was a railroader whose family lived in a Union Pacific house just off the tracks in Rawlins...
When b1's mom was a college student, en route from Salt Lake City to Laramie train would stop across from the family house to let her off. (75 years ago) 

²not me being pervy. Just happens to be the actual number right now.

19.8.21

The opposite of stripper

Special K: "Man didn't expose himself during anti-mask rant, CA police say."

b1-66er: You know what's funny...
...I behaved EXACTLY the same way when being accused of an illegal U-turn in Denver, 35 years ago.

K: As one does.

17.8.21

iLoveAGoodTitle

Special K: "iLikeBatteries
The Weekly Podcast that explores the world of batteries"

b1-66er: ILikeTheEntireConcept ESPECIALLY the naming rationale.

16.8.21

Rage-in-a-can

b1-66er:

b1-67er: I generally keep my phone ringer off.  My usual work pattern is work an hour or two, pause to get water or soda, and look at my phone in those pauses. Before I had a cell phone it was the same pattern, without checking the phone.  Still the phone is a temptation when I'm doing tedious work.

66: I think managing in this kind of environment would be difficult.
I used to have (weekly) walking one-on-ones with the few dozen people who worked for me. Partially to get away from 'other distractions.'
Only one of my reports said they liked it.

67: Interesting.

66: Maybe it's possible all the directed internal hatred is what gave me MS?
Maybe amplified through a can of Mountain Dew?

D4rw1n: Mountain Dew: Focusing Your Rage Inward Since 1969

13.8.21

Thinking about not thinking

The Grumbler: Today is Trump Reinstatement Day! How will you be celebrating?

b1-66er: By acting as though Federal politics are the least important aspect of my personal life.

TG: Achievement: unlocked.

12.8.21

A hard question begets an easy answer

Pickles: <pic>
What the fuck is this fuckery?

The Accomplice: FLIP PHONE!

11.8.21

Okay. Now what do I do?

b1-66er: "UNFUCK THE WORLD"

Sticker of the back of a Summerlin post office highway sign.

8.8.21

Big ideas thought shallow

b1-66er: "Giraffes May Be as Socially Complex as Chimps and Elephants"

Special K: But they lack a science fiction movie series.

4.8.21

Time to pull the rip cord!

Special K: ""NBC's Summer Olympics ratings are in free-fall"

b1-66er: "... And worse... Skydiving has not yet met the Criteria of Eligibility for the Olympics!"

Biting into the Pink

b1-66er: pic <trap to expand>
Lunch; Boulder, CO.

•••

Special K: Tasty. 

•••

F3mb0t: Yay!  It is sunny there!

•••

Pickles: Ear flowers

•••

Ms. Disc: Beautiful!

•••

The Instigator: Did you intend to send a pic that's more flowers than L?

66: I would say, "yes."

2.8.21

Where's my Kyoto flat head?

Special K: Japanese gentlemen, stand up please! https://youtu.be/wijrWMd9wvQ

b1-66er: Jesus.
I wish I'd had one final good thought before my mind went away.

K: Same. 

30.7.21

The school of Soft Knocks

Special K: "Japanese pole vaulter disqualified from Rio after his penis knocks bar off"

29.7.21

Reese's Puffsnstuff

b1-66er: We've now moved to the next level...

***

Special K: From 
Don't play with your food 
to 
Play your food.

b1-67er: Great idea.

***

Cap'n Happy: It's like a SNL sketch, without the laughs

66: Great line.

27.7.21

Double exposure

b1-66er: 
There was a man. He lived in an apartment. And put a wall down the middle.
On one side he had furniture, clothes and books.
On the other side he had different clothes. Different furniture. 
And a TV set...
He'd live on one side, until he got tired of it...
He'd put his book down.  Take his clothes off.
And walk over to the other side...
And he'd live there until he got tired of it...
And he'd flip flop...
And he did this back and forth until he died...
After he died, they went in to clean up the apartment so they could rent it out to college students...
These people went back to the closet in the very back of the apartment. And the whole closet was filled with these books...
... And each book was exactly the same...
... And this man had written all these books and had them all published...
... He never sold one, or gave one away...
... The name of the book was
Life and How to Live It

Special K: Thoughtful book story. Where is it from? Did you write it?

b1: No.
Did you ever see REM in their early days?
Stipe had this ability to just go off and tell these long stories in concert.
I saw them enough times that I heard some stories multiple times...

K: Cool. I didn't see them until they were already huge. 

b1: On one of the anniversary releases of Document, that story is the intro to a live version of Life and How to Live it.
I thought the story was not only fascinating and compelling; but also provided a spectacular Polaroid of what it was like to be in an REM audience... 
They were a strange band because they came from a place no one (yet) cared about...
... And at their very deepest core were all record store weevils...
... The result was they liked what I liked.
They'd play requests.
 They'd play without a set list and argue about what to play next.
They'd pimp other bands touring the music that they liked, or where they were from.
Document is the album where it all changed and they started getting played on more than just lowly college radio.

26.7.21

Tethered

b1-66er: "Issa Rae Secures Husband"

Special K: Was he floating away?

b1: I assume so. I didn't read the article.

24.7.21

EVERY day is STFUF!

Special K: 

b1-66er: Crass, but correct.

b1-67er: That is really funny. The delivery and chain smoking is funny. It's the "there are no deaf and dumb people in prison" advice.

D4rw1n: That is utterly freaking fantastic legal advice
I, literally, charge $1100/hr to say that in different words
Quite honestly, their advice is better than mine. Because it's way easier to remember
Causes me to think about quitting my job

23.7.21

Medals for Everyone

Special K: I'm watching The Olympics on DirecTV. There's an Olympics app, which wasn't there yesterday but is there today. Every time I use it -every few hours- it has new features. I think they're frantically working and updating it.

b1-66er: That's a job you don't want to have.

K: No no no.

b1: See anything interesting?

K: US Women's Soccer lost their opener. Very big upset.

b1: Yeah. 
And worse, Sweden beat them last time.
And they were beaten handily.
Is it The Olympics No One Cares About?

K: Yes.
Very astute.

b1: That's funny.

K:  I think so, at least now.
Time waits for no one.
But I can record it.
Their next game is v. the lowest ranked team in the group. That should be interesting.

b1: They're gonna have to make another set of medals with an asterix* on them.
*The Olys no one cared about

K: I think the competition will be legit. 
Just lots of other stuff is strange. No fans. Nobody to give you your medal.

b1: Do you have to go collect it from a bin?

K: Yes, with tongs and a hairnet.
I haven't seen it yet. I think they said it's on a tray.

b1: A TV tray.
With a cup of Nissin.
Has the US managed to do anything remarkably stupid in the Oly Village yet?

K: Nothing has been reported.
Blow needed first.

b1: Give the Yanquis time. It's like track, they need a chance to stretch and warm-up before the long jump into social ineptitude.

K: But the hosts fired a lead guy because he did an anti-semitic comedy skit some years ago.

b1: I saw that.

K: Maybe he ate bad ice cream.

b1: What flavor Nissin WOULD a gold medalist* be assigned?

<Instantaneous response follows>
K: Potato leek for gold.
Iceberg lettuce for silver.
Banana cinnamon for bronze.
Gold flavor is champion.
Silver flavor is punishment.
Bronze flavor is sympathy.

b1: Are those real flavors?

K: Not AFAIK. I just thought of them.

b1: I love how quickly you just came up with those.

K: I'm a little tired. That probably helps. 

b1: Always.
That was the subterranean power of 24HO.

K: Yes, and The Great Discovery

b1: Which was what, exactly?
(you can say, it's already been discovered.)

K: Tired means creativity
I guess it's like a drug. 
It screws up perspective. 
Also lowers my inhibitions. 

b1: Oh THAT. 
I thought it was brain damage¹.

K: That might also work. 


¹the hidden beauty of MS.

22.7.21

Fast food frenzy!

b1-66er: <screenshot clip>
I think these types of images use are being intentionally used to (perhaps somewhat subliminally) combat the 'Sleepy Joe' moniker.

Special K: What types do you mean?

b1: Wide eyed and crazy looking.
Editorial choice is made in every pic that's presented in news...
They have dozens to choose from on every image in every story they run...
And I'm telling you, that expression on his face here is not 'Normal Joe Biden.'
I see this happening more often...
Crazy stuff is showing up occasionally...
I guess the intent is trying to make him look more 'alert and aware.'
Come on, the guy's 80 years old.
He's not gonna look whack-crazy talking about restaurants...
Chinese hacking, maybe.
Fires engulfing the west, probably.
KFC...

K: KFC!!!

b1: Exactly•

21.7.21

A gust up the kilt

Special K: "Halsey Said She Will No Longer Do Press After A Magazine Disrespected Their Pronouns And Posted Interview Quotes Out Of Context"

b1-66er: The first unabashed hater of KTXT•

K: A sign of greatness. 

b1: For us...
... Or her?

K: Definitely us. 

Two, Green, and Even

The Curator: https://motsusocks.com/products/savvy-sox-roulette-socks?utm_content=Facebook_UA&utm_source=facebook&variant=39353463079006

b1-66er: Who DOESN'T like a roulette sock?
AND IT'S SINGLE ZERO!

•••

b1-67er: If you are buying roulette socks, those are the ones you want.

The Accomplice: Right!

20.7.21

Penetrating observation

b1-66er: "Jeff Bezos Made It To Space But People Can't Help But Notice The Dick-Shaped Rocket He Rode In On"

Special K: I think most rockets are 'penis-shaped,' for the same reason as penises. 

19.7.21

Tide e-Soul

Special K: This is the first time anyone has been inside our house in 16+ months.

b1-66er: Howz it feel?

K: Weird and nerve-wracking, even though they're vaxxed and masked. Windows are open, central fan is on.
        <4 hours pass>
The maids are done. They spent 3 hours doing "deep cleaning."
Sounds sexy. It's not.

Judge gives an F for the E-ticket experience

b1-66er: This is a truly 'just' sentence.
(The defendant's statement to the court was absolutely top notch.)

Special K: Yes. "The company of us who remained calmer in our protests may have made others feel emboldened."
"Your honor, if I have a weakness, it's that I care TOO MUCH."

66: It's best that you weren't the one presenting.

b1-67er: What's weird is the people they end up catching are the ones that are showing their faces on camera.  A lot of the people pushing the cops around were wearing all black and had their faces covered.  They were dressed for trouble.  I wonder how many of them have been caught.

66: I think we'll eventually find out.

K: The disguised ones were probably also not the ones on social media posting "DOOD I AM INSIDE THE CAPITOL JUST WROTE STUFF ON PELOSI'S WALL LOLZ OMG"
Some were doing an actual insurrection, and some were on the Insurrection Simulator ride.

67: I think so.  Some of these guys -probably this guy- were four parts dumbbell one part insurrectionist.  But some came with every intention of causing real trouble.

17.7.21

So THAT'S why those antennae are 'springy'...

Special K: "Curiosity rover discovers that evidence of past life on Mars may have been erased"

b1-66er: What a Great GREAT GREAT headline.
If it was the Weekly World News of our youth, it'd have a tag-on...
"... and with Eberhard eraser...
... FROM THE FUTURE!"

15.7.21

Every little bit counts

Special K: 'According to the company website, the original recipe calls for the inclusion of the previous day's batch, a graining process that continues to this day. "As such, there's (theoretically) a bit of Leo's very first Tootsie Roll in every one of the sixty four million Tootsie Rolls that Tootsie produces each day."'

Sign ☮️ the Times

Special K: <ed: mommafied>

The inner beauty of environmental desolation

b1-66er:How's the body?
How's the mind?

Hammerer¹: Body's tired. Mind is good. It's always a spiritual experience to get up into the mountains, pushing mind and body, getting unplugged. Hope you are doing well. 
(Pix entitled: Desolation Wilderness)


Photos ©2021 Fully Tacked Down Efforts

All rights reserved
Used by permission


¹As with Momma K, today is Ms. Hammerer's birthday

13.7.21

Skunk v. Gorilla

The Accomplice:
<Now LV, NV>

Pic ©2021 Pincesston Pix
Used by permission
All rights reserved

A new type of elbow grease

b1-66er: https://www.thecut.com/2021/07/kraft-mac-and-cheese-ice-cream.html

D4rw1n: The lede paragraph is outstanding 

66: Truly.
Must we challenge God every day?
May well be the greatest opening editorial line in the history of the English language.

D4: So freaking good
I am (literally) still laughing from reading it the first time

b1-67er: The idea is marketing genius, although an obvious nod to the Jones Soda Thanksgiving Dinner collection.

66: It violates every Draconian dietary law I have.
It's also a bent fendered participant of the Dietary Demolition Derby of my two former food loves.
I would absolutely eat a spoon full right now.

D4: Emphasis on Demolition 
"Free samples from an ice cream truck on Union Square July 14, while supplies last."
The author suggests that could be forever
Obviously incorrect. 
This is absolutely my comment the state of humanity: 
That ice cream truck will sell out in a matter of minutes

66: I like your side of the bet better than hers.

***

Sheridonian: No.
I like ice cream. I like Kraft Mac n'Cheese...
But, no.

***

F3mb0t: Uuuum.  No.

66: SO adventurous!

F3: Ha! Have you met me? I am better than some for trying new stuff, but pretty boring compared to you. That ice cream is not appealing. 
At all.

***

Corporal Math: I thought it was Katy Perry

66: I don't see the difference.

CM: Fair. I enjoy those things equally.

66: I can understand that.
Getting Mac&Cheese into a Shark costume would be a legitimate son of a bitch, though.

***

Juan: Next up : BBQ flavored iced tea!

66: And at that point all of humanity moves to the next level.

***

Mr. Crypto: I had goat cheese¹ ice cream the other day, it was delicious. Tangy.
Cheddar flavored ice cream is quite popular (Philippines? Someplace similar), I've never had it.


¹flavored, I think -- not primarily made from goat milk

12.7.21

Slowly considering a statement

Special K: On Jewish fast days, some people say "have an easy fast." Is that appropriate to say to you?

b1-66er: I think "have an easy fast," is not only appropriate; but also a clever and reasoned interpretation.

...ALMOST every waking moment...

b1-66er: What's the weirdest cereal in NJ, you say?
WONDER NO MORE!

Special K: I've been looking for Chocolate Frosted Flakes for a decade.
(Not continuously.)

11.7.21

Peeking Boo!

The Instigator: <pic>
The owl box we had installed in May 2020 is finally occupied. The guy who installed said it would take about a year.
The little guy has been chilling all day watching us in our yard.

DPRUSA: Cool. I love owls.
I can tell you how I ran my biology experiment to see what they're eating. I bet they nosh on mice and squirrels.

TI: We're hoping for gophers

DP: Yes, I bet Mr/Ms Owl would find them tasty


Photo ©2021PushMeKickU, Ltd. Used by permission. All rights reserved.

9.7.21

Nun the less

Special K: "Paul Verhoeven's latest Cannes movie is an onslaught of graphic sex, graphic deaths, elaborate nun gossip, and incredibly groomed pubic hair."

b1-66er: It also has its bad points.

Which man are you?

Special K: I got my work-provided COVID-19 test kit. 

7.7.21

Depends on the arm rails

b1-66er: "Bitcoin power plant is turning a 12,000-year-old glacial lake into a hot tub"

Special K: That sounds bad. 

4.7.21

A Happy 4th of July to all KTXT readers

Special K: Papa got a brand new flag. 

b1-66er: Walk your talk.

3.7.21

The rainbow of the Pro Tree

b1-66er: "Ukrainian 'parade in heels' plan sparks backlash"

D4rw1n: I suggest a better marketing plan...
Here, it is: Full-on Drag Race

b1: Yes yes YES pun intended!

D4: And nobody doesn't love a drag race 

2.7.21

All this and marmot too!

Former Meat Man: Glacier National Park, MT

All pix ©2021 Veggie-cicle Productions
(Used by permission)

Face Off!

Special K: 
"Victor Hedman of Tampa Bay is the first player in NHL history to score a goal in each of the 12 calendar months. Due to the pandemic schedule, last year was the first year games were played in August or September. This year's pandemic-adjusted schedule is the first time games are being played in July."

Face on!

The Instigator: I realized long ago, we have to live with the face we were given. Assuming no plastic surgery of course. 

K-Sum

Special K: "On this day in 1963, in one of baseball's most memorable pitching duels, the Giants' Juan Marichal and the Braves' Warren Spahn both hurled 15 scoreless innings before Willie Mays ended the marathon with a homer off Spahn in the bottom of the 16th, giving San Francisco a 1- 0 win"

b1-66er: That's the best single TXT baseball description I've ever read.

1.7.21

Lightning licks the thunder thumbs

Special K: "Jeff Bezos announces the fourth passenger on Blue Origin's first crewed New Shepard flight will be Wally Funk, one of the women of the Mercury 13 program"

b1-66er: I wish I was on THAT mission...
... Because every time she floated by I could say...
... GET THE FUNK OUTTA MY FACE!

Relaying good feelings

Special K: "'Go Suck a Dick': Quentin Tarantino Fires Back at Critics of His 'OUATIH' Bruce Lee Depiction"

30.6.21

Steps [continued] 2) Beat the mail through the wood. Step 3) Keep pounding.

b1-66er: The book on my living room table.

Special K: Enjoy.
The audio book narrator is problematic. Jennifer Jason Leigh  sounds like she just woke up and isn't that interested. Major vocal fry. I might return it.

b1: Do.
Buy the paper.

K: Not ebook?

b1: Tell me you either:
•are kidding
  >OR< 
• can't explain the deep cut in the middle of your forehead (along with some line like, "I don't REMEMBER anything happening")

K: I'm not kidding, I was just wondering if you were favoring paper over ebook / Kindle, or saying either was better than audio.
<45 minutes pass>
I returned it. 

b1: I wasn't ignoring you, I was just on my way into Actual Reality...
I WASN'T KIDDING EITHER.
The Spirit of OUaTiH, in case you somehow missed it, is late 60s Hollywood...
Late 60s Hollywood did not have audio books for the casual listener...
... CERTAINLY NOT ON DOWNLOAD...
... Mr. T is SO wrapped out on the general concept, he didn't even have his publisher release the hardback first ON REQUEST...
... He's emulating a drugstore paperback.
At my first job, I sold dozens of those...
Returned many more...
Is the audio book gonna have an ad for Oliver's Story (the compelling sequel to Love Story?)...
Is the fricken audio book goin' to tell you it's "The New Novel Based on the Film?"...
DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE IN AUDIO FORMAT?...
Hell no.
You need to return to the snooty "I used a calculator once and it had a Nixie display" kid you used to be...
You still ARE that guy. You've just wrapped too many decades of AAPL, koolness and Pancake House breakfasts around that kid.

K: Now I get it. Thank you, that makes sense. After all, he's the guy who rediscovers old film technology

b1: Get rid of the fricken Special K facade and grasp the Denver Comix Large K...
...(remembering there wasn't even any such thing as Extra Large back then)...
You're gonna thumb that paperback for ten seconds max and realize precisely how right I AM and how wrong you WERE...
Everyone makes mistakes.
Not everyone is willing to admit it...
Fewer still actively correct those errors.
95% of Americans won't step through the door of correction.
Now it's on you to tell us, after reading, of your experience.
(I think I'm gonna start mine tomorrow.
This has been a psychologically hard, but fairly reassuring, day.)

K: I had no idea it was in that classic paperback format. I thought it was the modern, larger style.
Not only am I gonna buy it, I'm gonna go find it at a real store.

b1: NOW THAT'S THE SPIRIT!

K: Seems like it.

b1: All the evidence in the world is, literally, at your fingertips.
You can make a decision better than 85% of the people who're presented EXACTLY the same facts...
BUT those people weren't
A) Crazy Denver Jewish
B) Related to Solid Goldstein¹
C) Raised in a bar
D) Pojo players
¹ as Mark Twain said, "but I repeat myself."

K:I wonder if drug stores are carrying the book. If not, an indy bookstore would be next best.

b1: Those are EXCELLENT choices.
If/when you find one, save the sales receipt,
and use it as your bookmark•
I'm probably better at reading your mood through TXT messages than anyone else in the world...
I can see you, nowtruly understand the situation you were in and you've used the K-standards to bail yourself out...
Today you stand tall over the apologetic murmuring pandemic survivors.
I salute you ...
... And look forward to your addled analyses...
...... with or without Muddy Buddies

K: Right on•

Have you done since before?

Special K: ...I still haven't picked up food since before. 

Just LOOK at that ugly nice thing!

Dear hunter: I define some days as good, only because they weren't bad.... Ya know?
One of my coworkers has a flooded basement....
And his car got smashed by a semi last year...
So... I'm ahead already.

b1-66er: Absolutely.
Really, all days are essentially the same -they are existence on the planet Earth- and you make a choice how to interpret them.
I swear to you at least 3/4 of the people who're angry about things aren't angry at the things...
They're angry at their interpretation of those things.

A peek at the cloaking mechanism of the world of the world in action

Special K: This webcast has a bed of semi-lively dance music under the space announcements. 
It's a choice. Not a good one.

29.6.21

Here, have some Boze, man

Former Meat Man: Went to the Museum of the Rockies today in Bozeman.
It was wonderful.
3 hours was like 5 minutes.
Unbelievable dinosaur bone/ history display.

b1-66er: I'm medium sure I've never even heard of it...
... Please tell me more.

FMM: This museum probably has 95% dinosaur fossils from Montana.  It is on the Smithsonian rotation for some other cool displays also.
One on the Vikings with artifacts from the 7-8 th century.
I'm enamored with history and the development of the Western half of this country.
I grew up in a small town in Western Iowa that was started in 1869.   Only because that's when the train finally made it up to that area.

b1: Yes.
The American West is mostly about either: the rail expansion, or the Mexican withdrawal.

FMM: There were a lot of people there; but a well managed flow.
It is operated by Montana State University.
There was a decent supply of college age kids working that were efficient.

Size matters

Special K:
"Apple is apparently Google's largest customer now, followed by ByteDance (parent company of the TikTok app). Apple holds 8 exabytes of data with Google Cloud, ByteDance is in the region of 500 petabytes — 16x less."

When swyping runs wild

(sent, and corrected by, The Accomplice)

Original: 
He was quiet and snoozy for almost 4 hours. Then in time up Lucy and pissed him off

Should've been:
He was quiet and snoozy for almost 4 hours. Lucy woke up and I passed him off

A Tale of Two Sushis

Denver, CO

A) "Quick casual" office lunch
B) Formal dinner presentation


Pix ©2021 F3mb0th3r3d Productions 
All rights reserved
Used by permission

28.6.21

YEW JUST STOP CALLING ME 'YELLER!'

Suttonhoo: <image>

Image ©2019 HooPix-MYPix!
All rights reserved. Used by permission.

Splendor and the Grass

Former Meat Man: Norris Geyser Basin
Filmed at 626AM today

Yellowstone NP
Possibly THE crown jewel of the US park system.

Pix ©2021, Meatless Productions. All rights reserved, used by permission.

Cells strike out!

Special K: https://www.nytimes.com/2021/06/28/health/coronavirus-vaccines-immunity.html

b1-66er: "Immune cells are STILL ORGANIZING to fight the coronavirus months after inoculation..."
THAT'S what happens when you involve New Yorkers.

Slaughtering the idea of concept

b1-67er: How much meditation are you doing?

b1-66er: At least 20 minutes a day. I think my counter said the other day that I've done 88 straight days, something like that...
But it's been longer because it hasn't 'just' been within the HS app...
So, what? 
100 consecutive days.
40 physical hours.
That's right order of magnitude.
I don't remember if I told you...
I started meditating in my last MRI and I wasn't even trying•
I've chased The Dragon, on and off, for three decades and now it's my little frothy cuddle bunny...
... But here's the amazing part:
I was SHOCKED when it happened...
and i didn't even snap out of it...
<oh hmm. Look. I'm meditating. Isn't that odd? 
It's interesting• 
it's curious. 
It passes by me like it's on a moving sidewalk. 
I brush it away like a fleck of dust on the edge of a goblet with a feather duster. 
Now where was nothing? I know it's here someplace. Oh there it ...>

67: Great. The little bit of meditation I've done always took me a long time to get to The State. Like 20-25 minutes. I did have a sense I was getting better at getting there with practice though.

66: Yeah. I couldn't hit The Spot. 
COULD NOT HIT IT•
but I got this tiniest glimpse when I was back at AAPL...
Like a blowing wind briefly cracking a door to the outside in a dark room. 
A peek. Just for a second.
And I got so 'aroused' by the 'event' it IMMEDIATELY went away...
...it's like seeing a cougar across the Saratoga plain in the dust at night...
... just long enough to know it's there...
To know what it is that I'm looking for...
So when I hit the first time on Headspace, I knew what it was...
...I jumped back out of The Space, but tried again, almost immediately, and hit.

67: That's fly fishing.

66: Remarkably similar.
Maybe there're other things like that? 
Like, say, painting?
(...not writing or photography.)

67: There is a story in the works of Lau Tzu where his students are criticizing a town butcher everyone goes to for advice. He tells them the butcher is the real philosopher. The butcher does not try to be a philosopher, he just is one.  

24.6.21

... And a slight bouquet of road tar

K-π: Right now I have cracked open the second of the three fancy non-alcohol drink bottles I bought to celebrate my backgammon win. 
As with the first...I don't like it very much.  This drink is fizzy and fruity but not sweet. More said to contain vinegar, and that is the predominant flavor. 

b1-66er: BAD ONE!
Martinelli's must be the way to go.
Their stuff is so good.

π: I'd much prefer a sparkling grape juice. And that costs $3.00, not $19.99

b1: I suspect badger droppings have a complex flavor as well.

Double Zeros!

MArch: Geez. I keep seeing headlines about that building collapse in Florida. It seems so third world; full of dangerous bribery and poor construction.
It is really fucked up it is happening in the United States. Of all the places this kind of dangerous bullshit could have happened? 
Florida, of course!
All of the buildings inspected by the Building Official have got to be tested now. Someone is/was crooked as fuck, and the only problem is that it was in the 1980s.
I wonder if that evil person is still alive and living in the United States...

b1-66er: It's very strange.
I stayed away from sending it to you because I knew it would be part of a much larger discussion at some point.
It feels very very Bangladesh•

MA: It's the WORST.

b1: It's the darkest side of the capitalism die.

MA: I'm not sure Bangladesh is low enough on the Baksheesh-for-Building-Inspection scale.
It's lower than the third world because "we" don't operate according to those rules.
People are still missing. It's heartbreaking.

b1: They have a weird law in Bangladesh where property tax isn't assessed until a building is finished... So the tops of all their buildings are incomplete.

MA: Somewhere we traveled together had that rule.

b1: What a surprise to be IN that mofo when it started to come down!
You'd have NO IDEA what happened.

MA: It would be hideous. I imagine that ALL structural integrity will be lost. So... all your belongings go down when they implode it.
And...there are other buildings by the same developer.

b1: Oh GEEZ!

MA: It's a mess.

23.6.21

Hi-lo!

b1-66er: Fasting always makes time seem a bit longer.

Special K: Slow fasting. 

Get the dashboard vacuum

Entropy Dave: The Miley Cyrus cover, despite the impressive backing band, seems to me like a very small bag of lint.

22.6.21

The landers with wheel cutters

b1-66er: https://arstechnica.com/science/2021/06/nasa-administrator-to-defend-lunar-budget-before-a-skeptical-congress/

b1-67er: Good quick explanation of the politics of funding NASA.  It will be interesting to see how much China comes up in the conversation.

66: Yes.
It'll also be interesting going forward to see how China and Russia get along.
I already know why they want to.

67: I view them politically as different. There is nothing Russia won't do to serve their obvious, and usually stated, purpose. There is nothing China won't do, but they will lie every time about what they are doing and why. I can see them getting along in most things related to screwing with the US. But at some point it seems like it would become a knife fight over something they both want.  

The way you waddle

Kπ: 2π and his spouse gave me this card for Father's Day...
I don't get it.


(Lower 2 images ©2021 Jester Pin  Productions. Used by permission.)

21.6.21

Dude, watch me make this flying leap onto this wall!

b1-66er: The Accomplice waters our cactus from several feet away with buckets having holes in the bottom... 
They:

A) encourage root growth
B) prevent  over watering

But now...
... they provide us with our newest friend.

I guess the tool shed wall isn't as grippy as it looks.

There's lies, damn lies and...

Kπ: The TV news is talking about the danger of Teen traffic-related deaths spiking between the US Memorial and Labor days, stating:
"30% of all teen deaths between 2010 and 2019 occurred during the 100 deadliest days"
(100/365 = 27.3%)...
I'm unimpressed with this 'spike.')

b1-66er: Nice catch.
Great analysis! 

Major Math ATTACKS!

Major Math: <pix>

(Images © 2021 MM Institute -- used by permission)

18.6.21

I am the champion of, uh, something

D4rw1n: I'm the world champion of forgetting how to play games between the times I play them

16.6.21

Tunin' the derailer of the mind

Smokey: I was thinking back on it because within a few years, all the top end mtn bikes were full suspension. But some were truly awful. Trek had two at the time. I think it was the Trek 9500, it was absolutely like riding a bicycle attached to a pogo stick. It launched the rider over the handlebars with style and grace at the slightest bump.  
It looks like it would work.
But it didn't.
Oh my memory is correct. It was the 9500.  
Why can I remember worthless stuff like this and not remember important things?