painless, jeweless

solid goldstein on vasectomies: Surprisingly unpainful operation. Considering they stick 2 needles in your scrotum...

the paws that refreshes

special K: The [planet of the apes] double feature tickets are $27-$30 each.

b1-66er: yeah.  what're singles?

K: 12

b1: yeah.  that's what I'm thinking...unless you're whacked on seeing a double.

K: No. That's too big a rip off even for me.
"includes exclusive souvenir lanyard and poster"

b1:  should include a handjob from caesar, or "a minimum wage employee who looks remarkably like caesar."

K: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
APE HAS JACKED APE
APE HAS JACKED APE

b1: THAT'S NOT A BANANA!

K: take your filthy paws off me, you damn dirty ape!

rhymes with "orange"

b1-66er: you are the singly most infuriating, invigorating, clueless and deeply understanding person I know.

zz: Oh that is so going on my tombstone!
I may weep.

b1: you are an exact and perfect fractal key...
... for which there is no lock.

z: Okay, now you're making me wet.

now we just have to get him self-aware on obnoxiousness

special K: I was just in Google's anechoic chamber.

b1-66er: coooool.  why and how was it?

K: Recording voice samples for voice reco group.
Very cool. Giant baffles, metal mesh floor with baffles underneath, thick walls.

b1: oooh.

K: I was aware of how loud I was swallowing.

b1: it's about fricken time.

you'll absolutely love the second act

special K: ... And I started writing a play.

b1-66er: what's your play?

K: Something about Silicon Valley as a strange and important place with weird smart people.

b1: oh.

K: "write what you know."

b1: it's not, "play what you know."

K: or "play with your self"

your mouther

cap'n happy: Sushi sat?

b1-66er: sushi saturday doesn't work...I'll be back in LV.

CH: Too bad for you. Could be the best you get had. I know the owner and chef very well but only happens on sat.

Fing auto correct.   Best you ever hard

Muther fucker!

for the love of godzilla

b1-66er: just saw the new "godzilla."  not as good as I was expecting.

b1-67er: Well it IS a Godzilla movie.

66: yeah, but that doesn't mean it has to be bad.

67: The only problem I had with it was bringing Godzilla back to life at the end.  Great cinematography.  The right amount of monster fighting. Killing the chief engineer early was surprising but good.

66: you said the best godzilla comment once years ago... "you don't need an excuse or a reason to bring godzilla back...you just do it."

67: Oh yes. This is an important component to All monster movies.

66: what?  are people NOT going to see the next G pic because you did NOT put a sequel hook in it?
"oh no, I refuse to go see the next giant monster with a radioactive power plant inside because their reason for it being alive doesn't seem real enough."

66: Right.  And this is like the 37th Godzilla. Do they really need to tip their hand that there will be another one?  How dense do they think we are?