those tiny spaniards

{the following is in reference to a trip i'm taking to spain tomorrow.}

K: Bet you $3 you see A Giants shirt or cap in España.

***

b1: not even. you give me odds.

***

K: Even. It's fucking Spain.

***

b1: it's full of americans.

***

K: But I like even odds.

***

b1: i'll bet you even i don't see 3.

***

K: Ok. Done

{note: betting between myself and the K is *highly* unusual. he'll
often start some crazy sentence with "i betcha that blah, blah, blah,"
which he sometimes follows up on. i have no idea what my record is
relative to the K. you're either witnessing raw testosterone; or
possibly a combination of giants win crossed with crazed thoughts of his
pole dancing personal trainer and knowledge that i'd likely carry his
bravado up on this 'blog. in any event, you better believe that if i
see *2* giants caps i'm going to walk through the rest of spain
blindfolded. if there's a lot of people over there like mr. crypto, i'm
doomed.}

the things that happen when all saints' day ends

K: We're going to SFO to meet the giants' plane.

***

b1: when does it get in?

***

K: Trying to find out. Probably 2 - 3 AM.

***

b1: it'll be crazy out there.

***

K: It's already a madhouse at the ballpark. Watching on TV.

***

b1: will they go *to* the ballpark?

***

K: Unknown.

it's a good thing they didn't lose

it took 14 minutes for special K to send this to me: Jesus. My team won. Holy shit. {apparently winning breeds vulgarity AND blasphemy}

that's gonna be quite a shrine

special K (immediately after the SF giants hit a home run to lead a series winning game 3-0): Oh my fuck.

almost rhymes with "hateful"

b1: this will be the first time any of your teams ever won a "world"
championship while you were alive, right?

***

K: It would indeed be. Nuggets, Giants, Sharks.

***

b1: that's either the trail of tears ...

... or the path of a fool.

***

K: No team in any of 4 major US team sports has been in its city longer
without a championship than the Giants.

***

b1: and that makes you ... what?

***

K: Faithful.

***

b1: i knew it would start with the letter "f."

birds of a feather

b1: my dead roommate used to watch andy griffith and listen to devo.

***

K: That's just weird. I like it.

just HOW wrong is it?

b1: i'm in a video poker bar that's got 4 TVs on. only 1 has the world
series. tell me how wrong THAT is.

***

special K: Super wrong.