9.2.15

did you hear the one about the guy who had an ass that was lame?

b1-67er (sic): I was just  watching the Grammys.  They had Usher sing a lame Stevie Wonder song.  In the last minute they did a reveal and showed that Stevie Wonder was there, and had him play harmonica for the last minute.  It was a cruel musical joke ...

It was like having the backstreet boys play obscured by clouds, then revealing that david Gilmour and Roger waters are playing tamboreen.

30.1.15

I'm not hungry anymore. forever.

special K: Momma Khad a crazy parathyroid removed. It was 8x normal size.

b1-66er: whoa, jesus.  what does THAT mean?

K: It happens. Who knows why? It messes up your calcium which is how they knew.
Now her calcium is normal.

b1: good.  can you sell it?  8x normal seems like it would be worth a lot.

K: KFC could put it between fried chicken and serve it.

b1: GREAT IDEA.  the "double calic-taco."

K: Nice.
Paradown taco

b1: you win.

15.1.15

all you've gotta have is heart (or something else)

b1-66er: how's momma K?  I know her health's been off.

special K: She's having surgery, probably week after next.

b1: oh, bad one, what for?  and is it related to that high Ca reading?

K: Yes - parathyroidectomy.

b1: goddammit.  what are the side-effects of having THAT done?
they treat her body like an experimental Puerto Rican phone.

K: HAHAHAHA
It's generally well-tolerated and not a major procedure. I hope that's true in her case.

b1: my mom has always said, "'minor surgery' is 'minor' until they do it on YOU."

K: BOOM!
She's shed a bunch of organs.  She's built for speed now.

b1: she's not built for "organ donor."

K: Not any more.

b1: when they take some random piece out of her do you ever think, "that's sexy" and ask to take it home so you can have your way with it later?

K: every time except the gall bladder, for obvious reasons.

13.1.15

we're all Charlie in the box

b1-66er: do you think it's more dangerous for your personal safety to be a jew or a muslim?
is it more dangerous in the 1st world to be a jew or a muslim?

special K: Muslim definitely.

b1: it's funny, isn't it?  because we think of "them" as being the threat, but actually they're seriously under siege.

K: Yeah. It's a tiny number of them who are the threat. But they're a convenient boogeyman for people who profit on fear.

4.1.15

where's my pretzel danish?

special K's brunch in santa clara, CA - featuring churro waffle!

2.1.15

side-swype of the moment

every time I stayed up on the people involved with you have to understand that the internet is particularly bad.

1.1.15

black out

(our 1st TXT conversation of 2015)

special K: <image attached>

b1-66er: this is why I don't talk to you.

K: How can I blame you?